Dear Michelle,

I’m becoming more and more depressed. I’ve been contemplating divorce and my husband just says, “no, I won’t give you one.” It’s left me feeling hopeless. For the most part we just go on with our routine of work & family life and we get along O.K., but he’s in denial when we get along. When he asks what’s wrong, I remind him that I want a divorce and he says to just get over it…”Can’t you just cheer up?” It’s gotten to the point where I don’t want to be around anybody, including my stepson. I just want them out of my house. I’m frustrated and fantasize about having a totally different life. I want to get my own apartment and just be out of my situation. What advice can you give?

Depressed

Dear Depressed,

No one can stop you from getting a divorce. If you have decided that the marriage is over and nothing will help it to live again, then move out. You are not helping anyone by staying there. Make your plans and take care of yourself. Nurture yourself. Surround yourself with people who care about you. Do life-affirming activities. Be sure to talk with an attorney to see what your rights are. Take care of yourself. You are the only one who can.

Michelle