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Michelle Gottlieb Psy.D., MFT, LPCC
Individual, Couple and Family Therapy
Resolving issues from your past that block your future

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Good Days, Bad Days

January 2014

Some days are good. Some days are bad. That is life. The secret is to fully enjoy the good, and not get too caught up in the bad. Unfortunately, many people do the opposite. Why do we do this? Perhaps it is what our families did while we were growing up, perhaps we are naturally positive or negative people. I am suggesting that while it may be interesting and helpful for you to dig into your “whys,” what you really need to focus on is changing the behaviors.

The first way to change the behavior is to notice that you do it. Do you worry about what is coming next or can you enjoy your present? Do you spend a great deal of time sad about what life has given to you or are you noticing the good things as well? You have just seen the second step: every day, find something good. It could be small: a flower, a cloud, a tree, a smile. It does not need to be at the level of Disneyland or a private jet to Paris. In fact, if that is your definition of what is good, that may be part of the problem. Take a moment, or two, or three, every day to appreciate the small things! It is amazing what a difference that can make in our lives and outlook.

Another very important thing to do is to breathe. Stop. Take a deep breath, all the way from your diaphragm. Take another. Now how do you feel? Often when we stop to truly breathe, our anxiety reduces and our shoulders go down and we can see the situation more objectively. Often when we do that, the situation is not as bad as we thought.

Some days are good. Some days are bad. Make sure that you have loving people with you. And enjoy the journey.

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