(714) 879-5868, ext. 5
drmichelle@michellegottlieb.com
Michelle Gottlieb Psy.D., MFT, LPCC
Individual, Couple and Family Therapy
Resolving issues from your past that block your future

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Selfish
Often when we need something, we do not do anything to meet that need. The need can be as simple as getting a good night’s sleep, eating a healthy meal or setting a boundary. We wait for someone else to do it for us. Or perhaps to give us permission to meet our own needs.

On the face of that, doesn’t it appear silly? Why do I need someone else’s permission to get a good night’s sleep? However, when we are raised in a family where our needs were denied or deemed unimportant, we never learned that we had the right to take care of ourselves. We never learned the skills. We may have been coached on how to take are of everyone else, but taking care of ourselves was “wrong” or “ selfish”.

But if I were to ask you if it is okay if your best friend or your child have the right to take of themselves, I am sure that you would immediately state, “of course!”. So, then, what is the difference between their rights and yours? We all have the right to get our basic needs met. All of us. No matter the family that we grew up in.

My challenge to you: treat yourself as well as you treat others! And, as always, enjoy the journey!

 

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