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Michelle Gottlieb Psy.D., MFT, LPCC
Individual, Couple and Family Therapy
Resolving issues from your past that block your future

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Should I Dump Him?

November, 2000

 

Dear Michelle,

 

I am seeing this guy, and for the 4 years we have been together I have not questioned that he is the guy I want to spend my life with. But now it is bothering me that we got together so young – at 17 (he’s the same age) and maybe we just got used to each other. Maybe if I gave someone else a chance, I could “do better”? This guy is so great, and I am lucky to have found someone as wonderful. But he is not my “dream guy”…I don’t know if that is a fantasy. If so, then how do I get rid of these unsettling feelings? I am very confused…. Please help.

Signed,

What to do?

 

Dear What to Do,

It is important to explore who we are before we pick our life partner. You are right, you are young and you both have a great deal of growing to do. But be aware, there is no such thing as a “dream guy”. Every person has flaws. You just need to decide if this man’s flaws are too big for you to live with. Remember, a man who is great as this guy sounds is nothing to sneeze at. Be careful of always looking for the greener grass. Sometimes what we have is just what we need. So, you are saying, Michelle this does not help me. Sorry, but only you can decide if you need to break off with this guy and do some exploring or if what you have found is the right thing for you.

Good luck and enjoy the journey.

Michelle

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