September 2001

My brother died unexpectantly about a month ago. He was 41 years old. One of the main things that has enabled my family and me to deal with the loss has been the incredible support from families, friends, and our community.

The terrible disaster in New York and Washington, D.C. occurred one week ago. I feel that the only thing that will allow this family called the United States of America get through this tragedy is the support from each other.

It is impossible to understand why a healthy man would suddenly die from a heart attack. It is impossible to understand why people would fly planes into buildings. There is no logic behind these actions that make sense to us. There are things beyond our understanding. So what we need to focus on is how to heal.

It is possible to heal. My family and I are starting to laugh and smile again. This country will also go on and heal and grow from this experience. For us to heal, we need to know that we are not alone. We are all grieving; we are all scared; we all want to know that we are safe. We need to reach out to others and tell them how much we love each other, how much we appreciate each other. We need to get involved. After my brother died, it helped that I was doing something, anything to make the situation better, whether that was helping to arrange the funeral or cleaning out my brother’s apartment. We all can get involved now. Call the Red Cross. Give blood and/or money. Give a hug to a frightened friend. Call and check in with relatives across the country. Go to your church, synagogue or mosque. Pray.

We are not alone. Reach out. That is what will allow us all to heal.