Have you ever had the experience of seeing someone you love making poor decisions? You may see clearly better and healthier choices than the ones that they are making, but they will not listen. In fact, they tell you all the ways that you are wrong. It is difficult and sad to watch people sabotage themselves.

But we need to realize that we cannot control others. In fact, we have zero control over others’ thoughts, ideas and actions. That sense of powerlessness is very difficult to tolerate. It, however, is reality. So, since you cannot force others to make healthy choices, what can you do?

You can take care of yourself. One of the ways may be by setting healthy boundaries with those loved ones who are not healthy. Be very clear when you can see them and under what conditions. If those conditions are not met, then end the visit. This is very difficult to do with people that you love, but it does create sanity in your own life.

Instead, turn the focus on self-care, which is something that you can control. If you stop wasting energy on those that do not want it, it opens up more energy for you. What will help you to feel more centered, healthier, enjoying your life more? Do that. And keep positive thoughts that your loved ones will one day be able to join you.