Be yourself. I am sure that you have heard these words before. They are words of wisdom. But here is where some people struggle: What if you do not know who you are?

This may sound strange for some people; however, for many people, it is a very difficult thing to define. For many people, they are who others have told them that are. Maybe their teachers told them that they are lazy. They then assume that is who they are. Of their parents told them that they are stupid. Again, that is how they define themselves.

But what if those definitions are not accurate but arise from the definer’s dysfunctions and wounds? What if that student is just waiting to be engaged? What if that child might actually be more intelligent than the parent? That person may never be able to honestly be themselves because they are looking through others’ filters.

The goal here is for you to define yourself. Do not take on anyone else’s definition unless you have thoroughly examined its accuracy. Are you really lazy? Or do you work really hard on the things that you are interested in? Are you really stupid? Or the things that your parent thought was important to focus on you do not?

As objectively as you can, work on identifying your strengths and the areas that you may need more work on. Define what you like and what you do not like. Bring down to the really simple such as your favorite color or food. Make it inclusive of bigger issues like your philosophy of life.

This is a project that will never be complete because we are always growing and evolving. Take the time to do it. You are worth it.